The carbon copy effect

August 4, 2018

Let’s play make believe for a second. Let’s pretend that someone has approached you with an opportunity of a lifetime. They want you to be the first human clone! Pretty cool right? I mean, you could send this 2.0 version of yourself to work when you feel like sleeping in, they could go to all of those PTA meetings that you dread, maybe even hang out with the in-laws while you are at cocktail hour! This is starting to sound more and more appealing. But there is a catch: this version of you will be developed without your personal input. A team of scientists will be watching every move you make, listening to every word you say, and gathering all of the energy that you put out into the world. But they will do it all from a distance. Therefor you cannot pick and choose what parts of you they deem as significant enough to be applied to your clone. Is this beginning to sound a little shady? Kind of “reality show” editing room floor-esque? I agree. But guess what… most of us are main characters in this show, and the 2.0 versions of ourselves are developing as we speak. For me, their names are Gianna Grace, Lola Rose, and Mila Jae Hamilton; and they are my insanely beautiful nieces.

Now I know what you are thinking. “I absolutely have input, I am actively involved in my child/niece/nephew’s upbringing”, and to that I would say you’re right. Of course you are engaging them, showing them who you are, and nurturing them in a way that only you know how. But how often are you nurturing yourself? Or the opposite, how often are you beating yourself up throughout the day? I know I am guilty of this. The negative self-talk, the tugging on my clothes body issues, the “throw a pillow over my midsection” seated position. These rituals are mine; but my little clones, the beautiful confident little girls who look up to me, they are watching and I won’t know until later if they see these projections as worthy of a carbon copy. But the beauty in all of this is that I do have a choice. I can choose to be present, to be aware, and to be apologetic to the one person who deserves it the most: me. I am not perfect, nor do I strive to be; but as a beautiful soul once said “You are enough. You have always been enough. You will always be enough.”

I cannot think of another statement that I would want to project to my nieces more than that. I can, and plan on saying it to them often. But as with most things in life, actions speak louder than words. So I am setting out to show them by showing myself that same compassion. If they see me loving myself just as I am in this very moment, the power in that alone speaks volumes. If I show them what confidence feels like, by radiating it into every room I walk into, that energy can move mountains. And if I see myself in the same golden light that I have seen them in, since the day they entered my life, I know that their lights will only shine brighter. Does it get any better than that? The empowerment that comes from being present enough to know your impact is something that is hard to put into words, but the positive reactions it produces are immeasurable.

So be nice to yourself today, and tomorrow, and every day after. If you slip up, forgive yourself the same way you would if your little carbon copy made a mistake. And remember: to someone in the world, you have always been the most beautiful light they have ever seen. They loved you before they met you, and they want nothing more than for you to know the depth of their devotion. So reflect it back to them, and let them know you love them too by loving yourself a little more every day. Because you are enough. You have always been enough. You will always be enough.

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